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The NOVEL that strippers tip at strip clubs!

Dear The Office

imageSo, you did it!  You actually did it!  Steve Carell is really gone from the show!

Who the hell do you think you are?  What right do you have kicking us in the nads like that?  You reached into a perfectly healthy, vibrant chest and pulled out the still beating heart.

Jim and Pam, keep it together.  You have to play more jokes on Dwight.  We’ve got to get more of the wonderful banter going between the two of you too.  Dwight, where are you going?  You can’t go anywhere.  Would you abandon a sinking ship?  Not you.  That’s not something you would do.  You’re the kind of guy to go down with it and that’s why we love you.

Eron keep smiling.  Andy, wear more outrageous pants.  Stan the man, keep it real with your crossword puzzles.  Darryl, you got to step up to the plate man.  The power is gone.  That’s you now.  That’s all you.  This isn’t time for nurf ball…sittin’ on your biscuit, never havin’ to risk it!  You got to step up and take over.  Come on! You were a riot in Last Comic Standing.  Make this happen!

Ok, that’s The Office now.  That’s what it is.  I don’t know if we can forgive you.  We will try to move on and get past this, but it’s strictly on probation.  Jerk us around one more time and we will leave you.  We will leave you so quick your head will spin.  No good bye.  No hint.  No nothing. Nada.

You might not even hear the door slam behind us.  You’ll be toasting yourself with champagne and you’ll turn around to find us gone.

I still love the show.  Keep up the good work. Blah. Blah. Blah.

Shocked,
Office Fan

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